( ESNUG 538 Item 5 ) -------------------------------------------- [04/01/14]

Subject: SCOOP - Bored covert Bitcoin billionaire to buy out the EDA Big 3
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  - I've also had a single source say that Mike Dini of the Dini Group
    has sold DNV7F4A's to two different "Wall Streety types" to -- and
    I kid you not -- do bitcoin mining.

            

    The DNV7F4A is Xilinx Virtex 7 based with 56 M ASIC gates capacity.
    And the irony here is that on his personal blog, Mike Dini likes
    to endlessly rant about the stupidity of bitcoins!

        - from http://www.deepchip.com/items/0537-10.html


From: [ Mike Dini of the Dini Group ]

Hi, John,

I have to admit it.  Your spies were correct when they reported that I had
sold two DNV7F4A's to some "Wall Streety types".

But the joke is on you!

What your spies failed to tell you is that I've had more than 200 DNV7F4A's
running non-stop for 18 months mining Bitcoins!!!  Satoshi Nakamoto was my
sophomore year college roommate at U.C. Irvine in 1979.  Nobody in EDA knows
this but I've been a Bitcoin billionaire for close to 1 year now.  I blogged
against Bitcoin mining so I could mine them myself!  Ha! Ha! Ha! 

Depending on the current price of Bitcoins, my personal net worth fluctuates
between around $10 billion to $30 billion (USD).

And I have to also admit, with all this money, my life has taken on a dull
sheen to it.  Nothing is forbidden to me.  With enough cash, *anything* I
can imagine is possible.  Anything.  (I just don't see how Dean Drako nor
Aart de Geus live this way.  There's no challenges left in life...)

So, purely out of spite and boredom, I'd like to break the news on DeepChip
that I'm doing a 3-way hostile bid to simultaneously take over Synopsys,
Cadence, and Mentor.  Why?  I'm bored.  A 3-way hostile takeover has never
been done before in Wall Street history.  It might be entertaining to try.
                   
Also I want thank all my fellow EDA co-worker friends who helped me when I
was a "nobody" by becoming their new Chairman/President-for-life by taking
over the EDA Big 3 and combining it into one massive non-competitive company
"SynCadMent" that monopolizes all RTL-to-GDSII flows for all EDA users
everywhere.  Because all competition will be gone, my EDA co-worker friends
can fix EDA bugs when (and if) they feel like it.  If the users complain,
there's nothing they'll be able to do because it's a monoply.  EDA Heaven!

              

When I mentioned this plan to my billionaire drinking buddy, Warren Buffett,
he said: "Mike, everyone knows you can't make big money in EDA.  The next
Google or Facebook is what you want."  But my other billionaire drinking
buddy, Carl Icahn, disagreed.  "I bought MENT at $8.00.  Wrote a few
newsletters to scare Wally.  MENT now trades for $22.00!  Big cash, baby!"

The one thing both Carl and Warren agreed on is that my "SynCadMent" can
have only one CEO -- not three.

                  

So because it might entertain me, I've decided that right out of the movie
Thunderdome, I'm going to build a big circular iron cage in the Australian
desert and hire Tina Turner to re-enact that two-men-enter,-one-man-leaves
scene -- except make it THREE-men-enter,-one-man-leaves with Aart de Geus,
Lip-Bu Tan, and Wally Rhines entering.

  

Hopefully they'll fight to the death (as planned) and the winner becomes the
new CEO of my "SynCadMent".

But because these are EDA CEO's, I have to plan for two weird contingencies:

  1. Since Aart is so used to having his lawyers do his fighting for him,
     and since Lip-Bu is often more interested in much more profitable
     non-EDA investments, and since Wally would rather intellectually
     debate rather than resort to violence -- it's possible that these
     three might not fight at all while in the cage.  No winner.

     If this happens, I'll fire all three and appoint Joe Sawicki as the
     CEO of "SynCadMent"

  2. The other possibility is the exact opposite.  Since Aart, Lip-Bu,
     and Wally are so used to viciously undercutting their own prices to
     spite their rivals, they might simultaneously kill each other.

     If this happens, again Joe Sawicki will be the CEO of "SynCadMent".

Why Joe Sawicki as my fall-back CEO?  Why not?  He seems to be one of few
executives in EDA who appears to regularly laugh and enjoy his job -- plus
he's never ever said anything bad ever about my FPGA boxes.  :)

     - Mike Dini
       future Chairman
       SynCadMent, Inc.                          La Jolla, CA

   !!!     "It's not a BUG,
  /o o\  /  it's a FEATURE!"
 (  >  )
  \ - / 
  _] [_     (jcooley 1991)